Calamity Jane’s Revenge (2015)

Erin R. Ryan is Calamity Jane, still in mourning over the death of Wild Bill Hickok, still dreaming of him on an almost nightly basis.

And though “Crooked Nose” Jack McCall has been hanged for the deed, she’s sure there are others who had a hand in Bill’s death.

She’s determined to track them down to exact revenge, especially against rancher King Garrett (Adam Scott Clevenger).

Seems Garrett was on the verge of gambling away his property to Bill when the latter died.

But Calamity’s being tracked herself, by new Deadwood lawman Con Stapleton (Todd Rogers) and his guide Colorado Charlie Utter (Al Snow), who want to put an end to the killings.

Will they be able to stop Calamity before she reaches Garrett’s Crooked G spread, now ringed with henchman just waiting to gun her down?

Or will Calamity’s attitude toward revenge change once she happens upon Fay Pauly?

She’s an Easterner who finds herself suddenly widowed when she and her dime-novel writing husband happened upon Groggy Dan.

Fay is used to a more peaceful way of life, where justice is doled out in the courts, not by a deadly gun-toting young woman with a score to settle.

Erin R. Ryan as Calamity Jane, about to enter a knife fight in Calamity Jane’s Revenge (2015)

Julia Gomez as Fay Pauly, the young woman Jane rescues in Calamity Jane’s Revenge (2015)

Review:

This film was made for a dime and looks it.

There’s one horse in the movie, and it disappears midway through. There apparently wasn’t even enough money in the budget for fake blood.

And Jane spends most of her time tromping through woods that could just as well be in Ohio as in Deadwood, S.D.

Fortunately, the cast conducts themselves with tongues planted firmly in cheeks. Fortunately, Erin R. Ryan is likeable in the role of Calamity.

And, fortunately, Julia Pauly does a nice job as Jane’s sidekick, trudging along behind her carrying a shovel because Julia insists on burying everyone Jane kills, even the man who killed her husband.

Professional wrestler Al Snow plays the guide for the lawman trailing Jane. You can tell he’s used to being in front of a camera too.

So keep your expectations very, very, very low, and you might find this independent film oddly enjoyable.

About those woods: According to IMDb, the movie was filmed in New Lebanon, Ohio.

Al Snow as Colorado Charlie Utter, the man tracking Jane in Calamity Jane’s Revenge (2015)

Todd Rogers as Con Stapleton, the new lawman tracking Jane in Calamity Jane’s Revenge (2015)

Directed by:
Henrique Couto

Cast:
Erin R. Ryan … Calamity Jane
Al Snow … Colorado Charlie Utter
as Allen Sarven
Julia Gomez … Fay Pauly
Adam Scott Clevenger …. King Garrett
Todd Rogers … Con Stapleton (new sheriff)
Noah Shane … Perdido Jack
Thomas Nealeigh … Pat Cotton
Joe Kidd … Wild Bill Hickok
Josh Miller … ‘Crooked Nose” Jack McCall
Rachael Redolfi … Sheandoah
Titus Wolverton …Lemonade
Donald Smith … Red Baxter
Mike Canestaro … Blackwater Bob
Joni Durian … Pilar
Eric Widing … Groggy Dan
Henrique Couto … Al Milagro

Runtime: 85 min.

Adam Scott Clevenger as King Garrett, owner of the Crooked G ranch in Calamity Jane’s Revenge (2015)

Thomas Nealeigh as Pat Cotton, the traveling salesman who crosses Jane in Calamity Jane’s Revenge (2015)

Memorable lines:

Calamity Jane: “I hear you might know a man go by the name of Lemonade.”
Al Milagro, shaking his head: “Only know the drink.”

Colorado Charlie Utter, upon getting news of another death: “God Lord, the devil is thirsty in Deadwood, ain’t he?”

Kay: “I’ve dedicated my life to peaceful pursuits. It’s a proper way to live.”
Calamity Jane: “Your peaceful pursuits almost wound up getting you scalped in a ditch. This is the land of cold steel. It’s no place for good intentions. And I suggest you get out while the getting’s good.”

Calamity Jane to Kay as she demonstrates her lack of six-gun talent: “I hope whoever you aim at is a portly man.”

Calamity Jane to Kay: “You’re worried about diggin’ graves. I’m worried about filling them.”

Calamity Jane, taking another derringer off a man: “Doesn’t seem to be a man left in the West with a real gun.”

Director Henrique Couto as Al Milagro, the first man Jane crosses paths with in Calamity Jane’s Revenge (2015)

Eric Widing as Groggy Dan, the kidnapper of women in Calamity Jane’s Revenge (2015)

Noah Shane as Perdido Jack, one of the men in Jane’s way in Calamity Jane’s Revenge (2015)

Erin R. Ryan as Calamity Jane, about to begin her quest in Calamity Jane’s Revenge (2015)