American Western (2022) - Once Upon a Time in a Western

Nino Cimino is Nico Raines, who robs a church with buddy Lance Holden (Johnny Availa), then stops in Monterey, Calif., to celebrate.

After all, Nico’s on-again, off-again lover Rita (Linda S. Wong) runs a saloon there. And Nico might not be ready to settle down, but he’s eager to spend a night in her bed.

Problem is, U.S. Marshal Capt. Harrison shows up before he leaves and is backed by about a half dozen deputies.

In the gunfight that follows, Lance rides off with the loot. Nico is forced to surrender to authorities.

His next stop: a prison known as the Devil’s Castle.

He spends five years there before he manages to escape with the help of a fellow inmate named Juan.

Juan encourages him to flee to Mexico. But Nico has revenge on his mind.

And when he returns to Monterey, he’s in for a surprise. Old buddy Lance is now the town sheriff, appointed to that job by none other than Capt. Harrison.

Nino Cimino as Nico Raines, bidding farewell to Rita again in American Western (2022)

Linda S. Wong as Rita, giving a not-so-warm welcome to Nico Raines on his return to Monterey in American Western (2022)

Review:

Some low-budget Westerns manage to exceed expectations in spite of their meager financing. Others are barely watchable. Check out the one-star rating, and I’m pretty sure you can figure out which category this turkey falls into.

I mean, where do you begin when discussing this film’s shortcomings? The tiny church in the opening scene that stirs up memories of “Plan 9 From Outer Space?” The modern picnic table that’s used for cover in a gunfight? The telephone poles in the background of a prison scene?

Okay, let’s start with lead actor Nino Cimino. He walks around in a black cowboy hat that looks like it was purchased at a tourist trap, all the while doing a piss-poor Elvis Presley impersonation.

Female lead Linda S. Wong is saddled with a ridiculous Western accent, when she remembers to use it. There’s a feeble old prison warden who wields a supposedly wicked whip, Problem is, he looks like he’d have trouble swatting a fly.

Then there’s Devil’s Castle. The film includes distant shots of what indeed looks like a castle atop a hill. The scenes filmed inside the prison give absolutely no hints of a castle setting.

The best things about the film: The poster image above. And the mercifully short runtime.

Chris Spinelli as Capt. Harrison, the man who arrests Nico Raines in American Western (2022)

Johnny Avila as Lance Holden, the partner who double crosses Nico Raines in American Western (2022)

Directed by:
Gregory Hatanaka

Cast:
Nino Cimino … Nico Raines
Linda S. Wong … Rita
Chris Spinelli … Capt. Harrison
Jose Adam Albarez …. Juan
Johnny Avila … Lance Holden
Shane Ryan-Reid … Adams
Johnny Mask … Tarley
Nicole D’Angelo … Mary
Sam Dobbins … Ferguson
Louis DeStefano … Clausen
James Menditto … Barnes
Robert York … Waston
Matthew Shelton … Tanner
Alex Strasko … Peters

Runtime: 66 min.

Jose Adam Albarez as Juan, the man who escapes prison with Nico Raines in American Western (2022)

Shane Ryan-Reid as Deputy Adams, watching over prisoner Nico Raines in American Western (2022)

Memorable lines:

Nico Raines, waking to Rita’s warning that the marshals are coming: “They showed up early this time. Must be Capt. Harrison.”

Capt. Harrison, marching Nico Raines across the desert to a prison: “C’mon, Raines. Don’t die on my yet. We ain’t made it to the prison.”

Rita, when Nico Raines returns after a five-year absense: “I don’t know who the bigger fool is. You? Or me being in love with you?”

Nico Raines to Rita: “I live my life one way. Right or wrong. That’s the way I live it.”

Nico Raines: “Don’t go wasting tears on me, honey.”
Rita: “You son of a bitch.”
Upon which, they kiss.

Nico Raines: “I ain’t scared to die.”
Lance Holden: “And why is that?”
Nico: “Cause when you and me meet up in hell, I get to torment you for an eternity.”
Lance: “Hmm. So that’s the way it’s gonna be.”