Heathens and Thieves (2012)

Andrew Simpson is Saul and Richard Boyle is Bill, two small-time crooks in post-Civil War California, looking for a stake to start a new life.

They think they might have found a solution when they’re told a Chinese couple who purchased a ranch outside the small town of Orofino are suspected to have financed the endeavor with $12,000 in stolen gold.

Bill dispatches Saul to check out the place. He winds up winning the confidence of Zhen and his pretty wife Kun Hua, but soon suspects they might not have any gold at all.

Zhen seems far more interested in improving the ranch; Kun Hua wants to see their endeavor succeed so her daughter can have an easier life than she has had.

But word of the “stolen gold” is spreading. Former Union officer Sherman Rutherford (Don Swayze) shows up with three henchman, determined to recover the loot for the rightful owner. Well, perhaps.

Moses Burke shows up calling himself a U.S. Marshal. Perhaps.

Eventually so does Sheriff Ashplant from Orofino and his deputy.

If there’s gold on the ranch, Zhen isn’t talking. Kun Hua just wants to find some way to make sure she and her baby survive the ordeal.

And Saul, not knowing who’s who they say they are, finds himself caught in the middle.

Andrew Simpson as Saul, looking for an opening to get away from Rutherford in Heathens and Thieves (2012)

Andrew Simpson as Saul, looking for an opening to get away from Rutherford in Heathens and Thieves (2012)

Richard Doyle as Bill, Saul's partner, determined to get the gold he believes Zhen has stolen in Heathens and Thieves (2012)

Richard Doyle as Bill, Saul’s partner, determined to get the gold he believes Zhen has stolen in Heathens and Thieves (2012)

Review:

In the “making of” DVD extra, the directors say their goal was to make a film noir with a Western setting, because that’s what was available. And they deserve kudos for making a different type of Western where — unlike so many we see — the line between good and evil is quite blurred.

But falling on the evil side for sure is Rutherford, played by Don Swayze. In one of the film’s more memorable scenes, he sings a song about broiling Kun Hua’s daughter and serving her up for dinner.

If the film’s not a complete success, it’s because Rutherford and his henchmen are bumbling idiots when it comes to securing prisoners.

Saul repeatedly gets loose to wreak havoc and keep the action coming. How many times are they going to trust him to cooperate in getting Zhen or his wife to give up the location of the gold?

Keep guessing though, because you’re not going to find out for sure who’s good, who’s bad, who’s motivated by what and who has gold and who doesn’t until the film’s final scenes.

Boyuen as Zhen, the man suspected of stealing the railroad's gold in Heathens and Thieves (2012)

Boyuen as Zhen, the man suspected of stealing the railroad’s gold in Heathens and Thieves (2012)

Gwendoline Yeo as Kun Hua, Zhen's wife, wary of the stranger in Heathens and Thieves (2012)

Gwendoline Yeo as Kun Hua, Zhen’s wife, wary of the stranger in Heathens and Thieves (2012)

Directed by:
Megan Peterson,
John Douglas Sinclair

Cast:
Andrew Simpson … Saul
Gwendoline Yeo … Kun Hua
Boyuen … Zhen
Richard Doyle … Bill
Michael Robert Brandon … Moses Burke
Tom Proctor … Sheriff Ashplant
Joel Patrick Berry … Deputy Clayborne
Don Swayze … Sherman Rutherford
Jesse James Youngblood … Bronco
John A. Lorenz … Paco
Roy Hall Jr. … Ed
Cecille Bull … Pearle

Runtime: 110 min.

Don Swayze as Col. Sherman Rutherford, determined to recover the stolen gold in Heathens and Thieves (2012)

Don Swayze as Col. Sherman Rutherford, determined to recover the stolen gold in Heathens and Thieves (2012)

Michael Robert Brandon as Moses Burke, another on the trail of the gold in Heathens and Thieves (2012)

Michael Robert Brandon as Moses Burke, another on the trail of the gold in Heathens and Thieves (2012)

Memorable lines:

Bill, as he and Saul are being chased: “They’re better trackers than we are hiders.”

Bill, trying to convince Saul to act against Zhen and Kun Hua: “If we caught a whiff of this, then you can bet other men have too. Worse men than you and me. And they’ll be trailing this like the Bethlehem star. When they get here, it will be a cold, black birthday for baby Jesus. You can count on it.”

Sherman Rutherford: “Baby for breakfast? (begins singing to the tune of ‘Glory, Glory Hallelujah.’) Gonna chop him up and slice him up, he’ll taste just fine / Dress him in the greens and soak him in the brines / Drop him in the bread crumbs and roll him like a rug / The baby in the pot, goes glop, glop.”

Tom Proctor as Sheriff Ashplant, a man who rules with an iron fist in Heathens and Thieves (2012)

Tom Proctor as Sheriff Ashplant, a man who rules with an iron fist in Heathens and Thieves (2012)

Jesse James Youngblood as Bronco, one of Sherman Rutherford's men in Heathens and Thieves (2012)

Jesse James Youngblood as Bronco, one of Sherman Rutherford’s men in Heathens and Thieves (2012)

John A. Lorenz as Paco, one of Rutherford's men in Heathens and Thieves (2012)

John A. Lorenz as Paco, one of Rutherford’s men in Heathens and Thieves (2012)

Cecille Bull as Pearle, the saloon girl Saul uses as a shield to escape the law in Heathens and Thieves (2012)

Cecille Bull as Pearle, the saloon girl Saul uses as a shield to escape the law in Heathens and Thieves (2012)

Gwendoline Yeo as Kun Hua, learning to use a six-gun in Heathens and Thieves (2012)

Gwendoline Yeo as Kun Hua, learning to use a six-gun in Heathens and Thieves (2012)

Andrew SImpson as Saul, finding something he didn't expect in Zhwn's home in Heathens and Thieves (2012)

Andrew SImpson as Saul, finding something he didn’t expect in Zhwn’s home in Heathens and Thieves (2012)

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