Frank Sinatra is Sgt. Mike Merry, Dean Martin is Sgt. Chip Deal and Peter Lawford is Sgt. Larry Barrett, three cavalry officers serving in the West during an Indian uprising.
The trouble is being caused by Watanka (Michael Pate), who is spreading his Ghost Dancing prophecy, and by Mountain Hawk (Henry Silva), one of his chief disciples.
The Indians have already wiped out the town of Medicine Bend. The three sergeants are sent there to create an outpost and watch for signs of more trouble.
They’re under orders not to engage the hostiles, but when Sgt. Deal gets information on the chiefs’ whereabouts, he figures it offers the perfect opportunity for him and his buddies to become heroes.
Sammy Davis Jr. is the black trumpeter who yearns to join the cavalry, if only someone would let him.
And the sergeants have to deal with the possible defection of Barrett, who wants to leave the service to settle down with pretty Amelia Parent (Ruta Lee).
But if he departs, they’ll be stuck serving with straight-laced Col.-Maj. Roger Boswell (Joey Bishop), and that’s not a future they’re looking forward to.
If you’re a fan of the Rat Pack and would like to see them act out Gunga Din with the emphasis on humor instead of action … well, this might be the film for you.
If not, you might want to avoid it. It’s way too long for the material. It’s a comedy with a script that isn’t that very funny.
And though he winds up being a hero in the end, Sammy Davis Jr.’s role as Jonah Williams, the black man just begging to join the white man’s club – and take orders from the Sergeants 3 — seems positively demeaning decades later.
This film was produced by Sinatra and directed by John Sturges, a director who brought us some fine serious Westerns, “Gunfight at the O.K. Corral” (1957), “Last Train from Gun Hill” (1959) and “The Magnificent Seven” (1960) among them.
But he struggled when he tried comedy out West — he was also at the helm of “Hallelujah Trail” (1965) — and he struggles here.
One early scene find our sergeants dispatched to a town that’s been attacked by Indians. They don’t find a single dead body. They do find one chief sitting in an arm chair and several more stoically sitting around a dinner table.
Soon after, a battle breaks out. The entire cavalry troop melts away. Until our heroes shoot off some fireworks, toss about some dynamite and the fighting ends. Then the other cavalrymen magically reappear.
Of minor interest, Bing Crosby’s sons — Phillip, Dennis and Lindsay — appear in the role of soldiers. Their star billing belies their minor roles.
Directed by:
John Sturges
Cast:
Frank Sinatra … Sgt. Mike Merry
Dean Martin … Sgt. Chip Deal
Peter Lawford … Sgt. Larry Barrett
Joey Bishop … Sgt.-Maj. Roger Boswell
Henry Silva … Mountain Hawk
Ruta Lee … Amelia Parent
Buddy Lester … Willie Sharpknife
Sammy Davis Jr. … Jonah Williams
Phillip Crosby .. Cpl. Ellis
Dennis Crosby … Pvt. Page
Lindsay Crosby … Pvt. Wills
Dick Simmons … Col. William Collingwood
Michael Pate … Watanka
Armand Alzamora … Caleb
Richard Hale … White Eagles
Mickey Finn … Morton
Eddie Little Sky … Ghost Dancer
Runtime: 112 min.
Memorable lines:
Cavalryman #1 of Sgt. Chip Deal: “Do we look for him?”
Cavalryman #2: “Bring him back?”
Sgt. Mike Merry: “Nah, don’t worry about it. He’s looking for the ghost dancers. Maybe he’ll find them. They’ll know what to do with him.”
Jonah, looking at the ghost dancers’ collection of skulls: “When the skin came off, how come the (head)band didn’t?”
Watanka of Sgt. Chip Deal: “We ask him questions. He did not answer. So we leave him here to rot. No food. No water. Til great buzzards come.”
Sgt. Chip Deal: “You bring any food? Any water? Any liquor?”
Sgt. Mike Merry: “No.”
Deal: “You ain’t much good, are you?”