Stagecoach to Dancers’ Rock (1962)

Martin Landau is Dade Coleman, a gambler and cheat who finds himself on a stagecoach headed to Fort Yuma via Dancers’ Rock.

Also on the stage: a lady doctor in training, a cavalry officer, an Indian agent and a young Chinese woman bound for San Francisco.

But between bandits and warring Apache, this promises to be a troublesome trip.

It’s made more troublesome when Loi Yan comes down with chicken pox. Fearing it’s smallpox, the stage abandons most of the group in the middle of the desert.

At that point, it’s a matter of survival of the fittest. Or it would be if the most cruel of the group — Coleman — didn’t have a gun. He kills the officer and forces the lady doctor to become his woman.

Suddenly, the survivors’ best hope appears to be Jess Dollard (Warren Stevens), who had planned to rob the stage, until the Indians caught up with it and burned all the money.

Review:

Hysterical little Western that could have been much better with a bigger budget and a more talented cast, not so prone to over-acting.

Landau’s character is the most hysterical of them all, especially once it looks like the small group might not survive this adventure in the desert. The film is also surprisingly violent at times.

Judy Dan, who plays the Chinese woman, came to the U.S. after representing Hong Kong in the 1952 Miss Universe pageant. This marked her next to last film. Oh, and the theme song is going to remind you an awful lot of the theme song of “Gilligan’s Island,” which debuted two years later.

Directed by:
Earl Bellamy

Cast:
Warren Stevens … Jess Dollard
Martin Landau … Dade Coleman
Judy Dan … Loi Yan Wu
Don Wilbanks … Maj. John Southern
Jody Lawrance … Dr. Ann Thompson
Robert Anderson … Carl “Whip” Mott
Del Moore … Hiram Best
Holly Bane … Ben Wade
Rand Brooks … Quint Rucker
Mauritz Hugo … Roy
Cherylene Lee … Ah Ling
Alicia Li … Mai Lei
Gene Roth … Jude
Charles Tannen … Sheriff

Runtime: 72 min.

Title tune: “Ballad of Dancer’s Rock”
sung by Bud Dashiell and The Kinsmen

Memorable lines:

Stage driver Mott: “That red-lipped girlie is sure enough fetchin’.”
Quint Rucker: “You better keep your eye on that Dade Coleman. He’s always got his brandin’ iron ready for these big sassy fillies.”
Mott: “I don’t care if he and that girl are chewing tobacco from the same plug. Me and that gal’s gonna pow wow.”

Stage driver: “Yellow woman! Huh. Only full-blood white Americans ride in my coach.””

Hiram Best, after a quick stage stop: “Fifteen minutes. Bah. We didn’t even have time to shoo the flies away from that rancid food.”

Jess Dollard to Dade Coleman: “You’re dwelling powerful heavy on something ain’t none of your business.”