Evelyn Ankers plays Calamity Jane, who is commemorating the first anniversary of Wild Bill’s death when the film opens. She quickly finds herself with a new problem.
She inherited a saloon from a man whose life she once saved. Now the man’s niece, Cecelia Mullen, has surfaced, intent on claiming the saloon should be hers because she is the next of kin.
The man behind the trouble is rival saloon owner Matt Baker, and he’s hired a newfangled lawyer from Texas, Gordon Hastings (James Ellison) to seal the deal. Once Cecelia has ownership of the saloon, Baker has already worked out a deal to buy it from her at a bargain price.
But once Gordon hears Calamity’s side of the story, the young attorney decides to side with her and her sidekick (Lee White as Colorado Charlie) and sets out to foil Baker’s plan.
Complicating matters is the fact that both Cecilia and Calamity have their eyes on our good Gordon as husband material.
Review:
Pretty darn bad, if not downright silly. After all, attorney Hastings is convinced he should investigate Calamity Jane’s claims of rightful saloon ownership after she and Colorado Charlie try to kidnap him on the stage bound for town. Anyone so desperate must have a legitmate argument, he figures. Hmm.
The ending in which Hastings winds up riding off — via stagecoach, of course — with Cecelia makes little sense either. He’s spent most of the film wooing Calamity, even convincing her to wear a woman’s clothing for a change.
Speaking of Cecelia, this was one of only two credited film roles for Grace Lee Whitney, not surprising considering the Grade Z performance she turns in here. Lee White might be the best thing about the film in the role of wise-cracking Colorado. He actually died of leukemia in December 1949, before the film was released.
As for Evelyn Akers, after making dozens of films in the 1940s, including many low-budget horror flicks, she went into semi-retirement after this one. Her only other Western was 1947’s “Last of the Redmen,” yet another version of the Last of the Mohicans story.
Oh, this film also features Raven, a horse with a talent for rolling dice.
Directed by:
Andre Lamb
Cast:
Evelyn Ankers … Calamity Jane
James Ellison … Gordon Hastings
Lee White … Colorado Charlie
Grace Lee Whitney … Cecelia Mullen
Jack Ingram … Matt Baker
Frank Pharr … Sheriff Atwood
Sally Weldman … Emmy Stokes
Rudy De Saxe … Herbert
Paul Barney … Dave Carter
Walter Strand … Carlos
Hugh Hooker … Raoul
Ronald Marriott … Nick Dade
Elmer Herzberg … Henry the Whistler
William E. Green … Carlin
Farrell Lester … Rollo
aka: Calamity Jane and the Texan
Runtime: 71 min.
Memorable lines:
Colorado Charlie: “Well I be a bow-legged coyote, ain’t this something? From now on lawyer man, you do the legal thinkin’ and we’ll do the legal shootin’.”
Lawyer Gordon Hastings to Calamity Jane, after she’s been shot: “Is it bad?”
Calamity: “Nah. Heck, I’ve had flea bites worse than this.”
Lawyer Gordon Hastings to Calamity Jane, after she’s expressed a reluctance to wearing women’s clothes because she couldn’t help out in a gunfight while wearing bows and frills. “There are lots of others ways a woman can help a man besides helping him in a gunfight.”
Calamity Jane as Colorado Charlie interrupts her just as she was about to kiss Gordon Hastings: “If I had my guns, I’d plug him.”
Colordao Charlie: “If I had mine, I’d let you use it.”
Calamity Jane: “How are the (stage) passengers?”
Colorado Charlie: “I can’t tell which ones ready for the coroner and which ones ready for jail.”
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